After being single for a while, it can be intimidating to get back into the dating scene. You might feel like you’ve lost your confidence or that you haven’t kept up with the changing trends of dating. While the prospect of putting yourself out there after divorce, becoming a widow, or just taking a long hiatus from the dating scene can be intimidating at first, with practice and mindful effort, you’ll be back at it in no time.  

Here are some simple tips to help you get back in the game and find love again: 

1. Identify What You Uniquely Need and Desire:

This is key in order to stand out amongst the ocean of daters and find a relationship that will last.  You need to do the work to determine what you really need in a relationship based on you as a unique individual and then, based on that, how it translates to a romantic relationship. Being clear allows you to niche down and not try to compete with everyone. It makes it so much easier for two people who are right for each other to connect. We have seen the difference it makes so often with our clients when they have taken the time to figure out what type of partner and relationship would be the best fit for them before diving in. 

2. Reflect on Your Past Relationships

Think about both the positive and negative aspects of your past relationships that were meaningful for you. What worked well? What didn’t work so well? What would you change in the future to make things better? This reflection can help give insight into the kind of person that would be most compatible with you, what you may need to work on and boundaries you may need to put in place. 

3. Update or Create Your Dating Profile

If you’re opting to try online dating, make sure your profile accurately reflects who you are now, not who you were 10 years ago! Be honest and authentic. Make sure your pictures are recent and represent how you look today (you’re uniquely attractive, embrace it!). If you’re not into online dating – not to worry. It’s entirely possible to meet the love of your life in more traditional ways (download our free dating profile template to help you out ). In fact, we have some great tools to assist in doing just that for those interested.

4. Explore New Opportunities

Now is a great time to try out a different way of meeting potential partners. There are many different options available, so don’t be afraid to step outside your comfort zone and try something new. From interest-specific events to joining a recreational sports team, there are plenty of fun opportunities available where you could meet your special someone and create new friends in the process. 

5. Reclaim Your Confidence:

After being out of the game for a while, it can be hard to rebuild your self-confidence when trying to date again, but it’s essential! Try focusing on all the things that make you unique and loveable. Remind yourself why people should want to date YOU! 

Being authentic is one of the most important things you can do when dating. Not only does this help you find the right people from the beginning (because no one wants their time wasted with surprises down the road), but it also makes your connection more authentic too. That said, try not to overwhelm your date with too much information right away – it’s okay to proceed with caution while you develop trust. 

 6. Don’t Put Too Much Pressure On Yourself

When re-entering the dating world, remember not to take everything too seriously or put too much pressure on yourself; instead focus on having fun and enjoying the process of getting back out there. 

 7. Ask For Help If Needed:

Don’t hesitate to reach out for help from friends or professionals if needed. Sometimes having an extra set of eyes can really help in finding the right partner. Friends may be sources of connection, and professionals, like a dating coach, can help you discover who you are, what’s holding you back, who’s best for you, where to find them, and more. 

If you’re dipping your toe back into dating after being out of the scene for a while, know that it can be both exhilarating and scary all at once. There may be some bumps along the way, but they’re all stepping stones on your path towards love. Your person is out there. Go out and find them. If you need help, send us a message, we’d be happy to help steer you in the right direction. I would also love to know from any of you who have re-entered the world of dating, what worked for you? Share your comments and advice below.